Life is not about being happy. Happiness is a happy side effect that happens once in a while, but not always. If we were always happy, would we even know it? I rather think the human condition is such that we cannot be continually happy, because then happy would become normal and then we would equate happiness with ecstasy. We have to have the emotional chiaroscuro to fully appreciate those moments in which everything really is shot through with light like golden thread ... being unhappy is what helps us realize that joy is precious. (ah, joy ... such a better word than happy)
I posted this as a comment on a friend's blog post, which was on the subject of happiness and how Voltaire was not as smart as people want to think he was (she never once said that. I am taking liberties with interpretation). In the original comment, I misspelled chiaroscuro. So embarrassing. >.<
My pleasure in my own (not at all) brilliant words led me to ruminate on the following:
Occasionally the drivel that flows from my tongue (or fingers, as I type) resonates with self-proclaimed brilliance. I realize that I am delusional, and what I say is usually quite trite or pedestrian, but I prefer to think of myself as insightful and brilliant. I would never say that out loud and in public, but there you have it. It is a false confidence, just like when I look in the mirror and say "Daaaaaaaaamn, girl, you is FINE!!!!" and then proceed to make sexy faces at myself, sometimes going so far as to take pictures to forever preserve my gorgeousness on facebook. I have not forgotten that when I take the makeup off, my face is ordinary, and my blonde eyelashes give me "the odd, lashless look of a rabbit." But in my mind, on good face days, and on good brain days, I am gorgeous and brilliant. Just like the people who love me perceive me. I find it helpful to take pictures or jot down my self-deemed brilliant thoughts for posterity, and for myself ... because I never know how long those bursts of delusion will last. It's good to be able to remind myself that sometimes I look like this, and sometimes I say really cool things, and if I were Adele, people would post my brilliant words over a gorgeous picture of me, and then pin it all the fuck over pinterest.
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| If I were a famous person, my fans would do something like this. |
